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Brexit and forced arranged marriage-the similarities

From https://thetempest.co/2019/04/05/weddings/forced-marriage-is-not-the-same-as-arranged-marriage-heres-the-difference/

There has been considerable media coverage of Boris Johnson’s decision to prorogue Parliament. People have been protesting in the street. (2.)

In the past I have helped people escape forced arranged marriage.

Please read the definition of a forced marriage, the case studies, the divorce procedure and then you’ll see the similarities between that and the Brexit deal.

What is a forced marriage?

According to the Foreign and Commonwealth office

A forced marriage is a marriage where one or both people do not consent to the marriage and pressure or abuse is used. (3) and (4.) They say that this is different from an arranged marriage. Please let me be clear on this.

ALL arranged marriage is forced marriage. They are one and the same. They may not be forced to get married but they are certainly forced to stay together!

How do they force people to marry?

Very often they beat them into submission. Often physically but often emotionally, neglectfully and sexually. I am aware of cases where fathers have raped their daughters into submission to marry.  was not in the least bit surprised to see Bride forced into arranged marriage was raped by disabled groom as mum gave instructions from door (5.)

If by some miracle either party can get divorced then the community they come from will go to enormous lengths to ensure that the divorce does not go through for four reasons.

  • Family honour.
  • Loss of money.
  • They are worried that others will get divorced.
  • They are worried they will find it more difficult to get more people into forced marriage.

Once the application to get divorced is put in it is prudent to get a temporary restraining order against the abusive party pending degree absolute. After that very often a permanent restraining order is often required.

Please take two minutes to watch this video (6.)

Let me give you some case studies from my own experience-my assistant. (7)
I am a 3rd generation ex Muslim and I grew up in Leicestershire. By 3rd generation I mean that my grandparents were Muslim immigrants, their son-my Dad- married a UK born and raised Muslim woman. However are these women saying that no Muslim woman has been oppressed? 

My brother and Dad used to thump me like crazy and said they could do so because of their religion. In fact the Imam used to teach all men at the mosque to beat their wives and female relatives if we didn’t obey them. My brother once made a video of me in the shower and showed it to all his male muslim friends for money! I was told when I refused to wear a burqua that they would cut my face with razor blades and pour acid on my face. I was thumped black and blue when I even tried make up when I was invited to my friend’s sister’s wedding. I joked that I would find my future husband there.

My Dad thumped me saying I would marry who he chose whether I liked it or not. 

When I was 13 I was taken to India with my four year old cousin. I was to be taken across the border to Pakistan to be forced to marry a 42 year old. My four year old cousin was due to have female circumcision. 

Luckily there is a nice thing called Skype and I got onto the instant messenger. I contacted my best friend and she asked for my address. Within hours her cousin who happened to be in India at the time turned up with some armed thugs, took me and my cousin to safety. You should have seen this guy in action-it was like watching Bruce Lee- but better! Mind you his name is James Bond! The first thing he did was take my cousin by the hand and put her in the care of a young woman who was with the armed thugs.

We were brought back home taken into care and fostered. The first thing I did was burn my hijabs and burquas and ate a hamburger and pork sausages! I then turned vegetarian!!! I felt free because for the first time in my life I could talk to boys outside my family. I went on holiday and I wore a bikini. I felt free. Its only when you escape Islam you realise how oppressed you are. Any Islamic woman who thinks she is not oppressed is deluded. You only realise how oppressed you are when you leave that prison they call Islam! I have converted to Christianity. My family have said that since I left the religion and dishonoured them they will kill me if they see me again. They also lost a huge amount of money because I didn’t go through the arranged marriage. That’s why I have a new name etc and hide my photo on social media.

My family are under a restraining order-they are not allowed to come anywhere near me or my cousin. I know there are tens of thousands of good Muslims and I do love your videos. Keep up the great work but spare a thought for people like me.Now please watch this video (8) and look at the warning signs.

A very tragic case that had a very happy ending 

There is one young lady who is very dear to me. One day I went to visit I heard screams as I entered. Asian people are very complacent with security. I rushed to the source of the noise. I found a young woman being kicked black and blue by her husband as she lay on her daughter trying to protect her.

It’s not a good thing to do when I am around! I threw this man across the room and gave him the beating of his life. I told him that if he ever did that again I would kill him.

A few years later the young lady showed a video to her mother of two women getting married. The mother broke down in tears. Her knees gave way. The young daughter asked what happened. It came out.

The mother revealed that she knew from the age of 13 she was into girls and not men. On finding out her parents forced her to marry a man who was 20 years older than her to keep the family honour.

She said that every time she had sex with him she felt as if she was being raped. This man used to beat her all the time. He was very verbally abusive. He was very toxic. Nothing was good enough. He didn’t take seconds to start criticising the slightest imperfection. He always dug up the past. He would make his wife and daughter feel insignificant and put them down. He was a control freak. He never cared about their feelings. He didn’t understand the word “no”. He liked to see them suffer. Everything was all about how he thinks, wants and feels.

The young daughter said it was time for divorce. The young lady and her mother went on holiday. The daughter fixed her up with someone and they hit it off.

A few weeks later the father had to go to India on business and to find a husband for his daughter- bearing in mind she’d been with her current boyfriend for 6 years! When he came back he found his wife had moved out. I had the great pleasure of serving a restraining order against him and divorce papers. He took a swipe at me but that was a bad move.

The restraining order was a temporary one pending divorce.

Now the restraining order has been made permanent. The divorce has gone through. She didn’t take anything. She just wanted out. He can’t contact his wife or daughter.

Now please look at this tragic case (9.)

How do you get divorced? 

The procedure is a long matter.

You apply if the 5 grounds for divorce have been met (10.)

  • Adultery.
  • Unreasonable Behaviour.
  • Desertion: Your husband or wife has left you for at least 2 years before you apply for divorce. You can still claim desertion if you have lived together for up to a total of 6 months in this period, but that will not count towards the 2 years.
  • You’ve been separated for at least 2 years You can apply for a divorce if you’ve been separated for at least 2 years before applying for divorce and you both agree to it. Your husband or wife must agree in writing. It may be possible for you to show that you’ve been separated while living in the same home as your wife or husband as long as you’re not living together as a couple (for example you sleep and eat apart).
  • You’ve been separated for at least 5 yearsYou can apply for a divorce if you’ve been separated for at least 5 years before applying, even if your husband or wife disagrees

If they have been met and both parties agree then you get decree nisi. After 43 days you get decree absolute and it’s over and done with. If your spouse contents it then it goes to court.

How this relates to Brexit

Well the people of Britain were forced into the relationship with Europe. The public was never consulted.  We had to surrender our powers and sign the European Communities Act. Under this law the UK Parliament passed the European Communities Act. It gave direct effect to EU law and meant that if there was a conflict between an act of the British Parliament and EU law, Parliament lost out and EU law prevailed (11.)

We were taken into the EU illegally, so is our membership even legal now? (12.) An article by Vernon Cole explains PM Edward Heath should have held a Referendum before he signed the treaty that gave away our sovereignty to the EU. Parliament has legal sovereignty, but the people have political sovereignty. In 1972, Heath was afraid to hold a Referendum, because there was huge antipathy to the Common Market at that time. (2 to 1). So without holding the requisite Referendum, he signed the European Communities Bill, making us part of the Common Market that later became the EU.

Vernon Cole says: “In 1972, when Heath decided to take Britain into the Common Market, he used Parliament’s legal sovereignty to deny and permanently limit the political sovereignty of the electorate. Heath and Parliament changed the basic rules and they did not have the right (legal or moral) to do that. The 1972 European Communities Bill wasn’t just another Act of Parliament. Heath’s Bill used Parliament’s legal sovereignty, and status as representative of the electorate, to deny the fundamental rights of the electorate.

In an attempt to make our membership legal, Harold Wilson held a “retrospective Referendum”, but according to many British constitutional experts, this referendum was also illegal.

Mr. Cole says: “Attempts through the courts to annul our membership of the European Union on the basis that Parliament acted improperly have failed because Parliament, through its legal sovereignty, is the source of the law in Britain and the courts are, therefore, unable to challenge any Parliamentary Act.”

Sometimes in a forced arranged marriage they force them to publicly renew their vows for honour reasons.

Over the years the EU has plundered us of our wealth, abused us, humiliated us, robbed us and repeatedly raped the British public. In exactly the same way as an abusive husband can abuse, humiliate, rob and rape his vulnerable wife.

Now we have made a decision to leave the EU the community from which we are leaving is going hell for leather to stop us leaving. Let’s consider the reasons.

  • Honour- the fact that we are leaving sends a signal to the world that membership of the EU is not all it’s cracked up to be.
  • Loss of money. When we leave the EU they will be £50 million a day down. Before he died I attended a lecture from the late Tony Benn MP who said that if there was ever a referendum to leave the EU the politicians would fight tooth and nail to stay in the EU because they get paid a fortune by the EU. If anything the EU owes us money.
  • They are worried others will leave.
  • They are worried that they will not be able to get other countries to join the EU e.g. Russia.

Prorogue of Parliament

The Prime Minister has prorogued parliament in exactly the same way as you get a restraining order against a violently abusive husband. The current session of Parliament was initiated by a Queen’s speech under Prime Minister Theresa May’s government. Now PM Boris Johnson is in charge he wants to see out her term of office by a suspension of parliament with a new Queen’s speech under his authority.

What you can do

Sign this parliamentary petition

https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/254329

Brexit is in chaos. Leave won in 2016 that should be honoured. In the 2016 debates, both sides stated this meant leaving the European Union, Customs Union, Single Market and European Court of Justice.

This petition is for the government to commit to leave with No Deal but defer the leave date so as to leave in an orderly fashion. 

After six months in October 2019 we leave, no deals, no if’s, no but’s, no delays. We adopt all law as our own and we trade under World Trade Organisation rules. 

We are then free to build a future relationship from this position without any time constraints, on an equal basis without one side holding all the cards. Our future relationship with the world would be for the government of the day to decide, as it does on all other international issues

Arranged marriage If you suspect anyone is being forced into a marriage against their will inform the police. and the forced marriage unit. If you know of anyone who is under the age of 25 going to Bangladesh, India or Pakistan make sure you inform the police.

Conclusion

We are coming out of a forced arranged marriage, things can only look better now we are leaving.

Bibliography

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jPmeUZizaXs&list=PLv5_vg_ZHMDEzZSI9X5apjDvWKwpUH6wb&index=4 Nick Ferrari Wallops MPs on Question Time
  2. Parliament suspension: Thousands protest across the UK https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-49534940
  3. What is a forced marriage?https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/what-is-a-forced-marriage
  4. What is a forced marriage UK Government https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/325920/FCO_FM2014_A6_web.pdf
  5. Bride forced into arranged marriage was raped by disabled groom as mum gave instructions from door https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/bride-forced-arranged-marriage-raped-13905308
  6. Right to Choose: the consequences of forced marriage foreign and common wealth office https://youtu.be/pSPxOa9tCOI
  7. The story of Rebecca Craig in response to 20 Questions for Burqua wearers https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7I-C3cBgOn8&lc=Ugw7Obvs9CxOU0fSXb14AaABAg
  8. Right to choose: Spotting the signs of forced marriage – Nayana Foreign and Commonwealth office https://www.gov.uk/guidance/forced-marriage#recognise-a-forced-marriage
  9. Rubie’s Story – Forced Marriages and Honour Based Abuse https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hObICnCK-Fc
  10. Get a divorce https://www.gov.uk/divorce

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